I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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