Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
