I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
