remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
