first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Randomize
