Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize