i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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