absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
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