New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
