No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
you never un-have a 4some
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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