you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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