Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
