idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
