I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
