I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
