I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
