that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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