He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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