do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Randomize
