Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize