i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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