come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
