the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
