so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize