Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
