How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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