Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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