Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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