apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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