So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
