Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
