Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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