Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
