I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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