Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
