you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
