and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
