her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Randomize
