love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
