I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Randomize
