She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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