She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
