bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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