proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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