Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I queefed so loud it echoed.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize