The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
