yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
