Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
