Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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