but the lizard people decide everything anyway
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
