im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize